Work hard at school, get a safe nine to five, buy a house because nothing's as safe as bricks and mortar, and then count down your days until retirement.
Wooo. Sounds fun, doesn't it?
We've got this all wrong.
Yesterday's rules aren't today's rules. And for once, it isn't the academic rules that I'll attack here!
Let's start with the end - retirement.
It has been clear to me for a long time that there'll be no such thing as a 'retirement' for me, and likely for many of my generation. I'm one of the elder Millenials, desperately clinging on to the coattails of this generation as a 1981 vintage, and have seen a number of indicators pointing towards this in the UK:
the alignment of male and female pensionable ages,
proposed increase in pensionable ages,
restrictions around tax relief on pensions,
the shift of burden for pension funding from government to employer/ee, and so on
Spending just a little time with a spreadsheet and some finger in the air return rates confirms what I've long suspected - I'll be working to the grave. Short of putting every last penny away, I'll need to so that I can afford some semblance of a lifestyle. And yes, I enjoy avocado toast and Netflix.
But here's where I become really controversial - the healthcare improvements that we all are benefitting from right now, and the societal shifts in expectations on us all, allow us to work longer.
It was my friend Richard Brewin who first mentioned to me that when he turned 50, he felt a much younger 50 than his Dad was. Perhaps it's the naivety of age, or a very real example of recency bias (given that I looked in the mirror 20 seconds ago and last saw my Dad at 42, 20 years ago!) but yes, I am a much younger 42 year old than my Dad was.
I still don't know what I want to do when I grow up.
I know that's not what you'd expect to hear from someone who keynotes and writes about how to BOSS IT and how to 'transform your life', but it's a fact.
I don't.
I still feel young, full of energy, and full of wonder.
Rather than counting down the days until retirement, I worry about having days cruelly taken from me too early.
In my opinion, a big part of our misalignment on this whole situation comes back to the sentence I began with. Go to school to get a job. Get a job to get a permanent home to be bound to. Count down the days until retirement. And then count down the days until you're too old to enjoy it.
I'm not going to flippantly exclaim "there's got to be a better way...", simply because deep down, we all know that there is.
I've seen people live in caravans with young children, in the hope of saving enough for a deposit. In the UK.
They must be mad!
I've seen people succumb to 110% mortgages. 40 year mortgages. Financial traps which you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy.
Getting that 'foot on the ladder', but not realising the ladder is leaning against the wrong wall.
A wall of a starter home, which will only be suitable for the first few years of family life at best. Let's not even look at the sums around the cost of moving and the sunk cost of stamp duties etc which have an awful tendency to negate a good proportion of gains.
Nor the fact that average share portfolios mirroring the Dow Jones actually sit very close to property (7.3% vs 7.0% over the 70 years of the Queen's reign, according to the Daily Mail).
"Ahh, but you won't have to pay rent with your own house. No, but you'll have dividends to pay for it, and you won't need to fix the boiler!"
To close off that mini rant about our societal conditioning around our normal life journey... even cash sat in the bank would have averaged 6.1% return over that time pegged to Base Rate!
But of course, we don't have cash for it to sit in the bank (or buy shares) - and that's why we buy property, because it's leveraged. We can't actually afford it, we don't actually own it, but we get into debt to have the perception of having made it.
Tying us down yet further into that job.
The 'safe 9 to 5' that is utterly uninspiring.
The one where we have that calendar on our desk with our retirement date marked, counting the days, weeks, months, years...
And again, I’ve seen that.
People disregarding their morals and working for ‘the devil’ because it pays well.
Riding the career wave, with no idea why they are on that journey and whether it’s the right journey.
If it's not glaringly obvious by now - haven't you thought of doing something you want to, right now?
Rather than doing the do because it's what you did yesterday, and it’s what your parents did before you, and it's what you need to do today to be able to retire tomorrow, wouldn't it be more fun if you didn't feel the need to retire?
If you still had that sense of wonder and anticipation about what comes next?
If you were thoroughly excited about what the next 50 years could bring, and your part to play in it all?
That’s not to say that buying a house isn’t good. Nor is it to say that a ‘safe 9 to 5’ isn’t good. Etc.
These things are only not good if you have to make huge sacrifices elsewhere, just to conform to the paradigms you feel you have to conform to. Especially those huge sacrifices to your happiness.
The Japanese had a term for this conforming - the ‘salaryman’ - which was the ever loyal worker, who works his butt off for his company. Or hers, I guess. Anyway, imagine Dwight Schrute from The Office.
I’m absolutely fine with my kids being ‘salaryman’ if that makes them happy. But if it doesn’t, I’d far rather them be happy than be ‘salaryman’.
Make your home a holiday.
Make your work play, and your play work.
It might sound silly, but when you hit that sweet spot, you don’t have the Sunday evening dread.
Just one footnote on this.
When I was younger, I often wondered why rich people, who seemed truly successful, worked until their deathbed when by all reasonable standards, they could have retired earlier than most.
In fact, I tried retirement when I had the chance.
It was bloody boring.
I ended up being involved in the takeover of a National League South football club within a few weeks. I went mad with nothing to do.
Perhaps, the reason why those 'rich people' were rich and successful was because they found something that ticked that box. Which made them never feel the need to conform and retire.
(PS: If you have a child, don't give up your family time and comfort, living in a caravan working multiple jobs for some future bricks. They'd far rather that mum and dad were there, than mum and dad being future homeowners. They're not embarrased by renting, they just want to go to the park and spend time with you. You can be happy too)
Indeed - similar to the Mexican Fisherman parable - crazy how many fall into the trap of working 50 weeks for 2 weeks of life.
Very true, Carl. I often think of those few tribes left in the Amazon Rainforest. They all get a home, have food and work. They don’t have corporate bosses telling them that if they work hard they can climb the greasy pole.
A system of smoke and mirrors has been created to offer people the slim chance that when they retire they can have the lifestyle those Amazonian people have throughout their lives. Forget the electronics and white goods. It’s family, shelter and food that counts.